Junaedi dadi Juru Kunci

Apa bedane "tandha" kalo "tenger"?
"Tenger kuwi  barang sing dileletke umpamane cet"
"Tandha kuwi sing njaluki satus turut pasar"
........


"Awake njengat"
"Lho sing njengat mung awake thok?"
.......

Kuwi cuplikane crita Junaedi dadi juru kunci
1. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 1
2. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 2
3. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 3
4. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 4
5. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 5
6. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 6
7. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 7
8. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 8
9. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 9
10. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 10
11. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 11
12. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 12
13. Junaedi - Juru Kunci 13

Senam Wajah ....Tips sehat

Senam wajah saged marakke kulit kenceng lan katon seger. Para ahli kesehatan lan ahli kecantikan wis mataun-taun oleh golek cara sing paling murah amrih bisa marakke kulit tetep seger.
Manika salah setunggal cara supados kulit wajah tetep seger.
Matur nuwun mas Rowan sampun kersa dados peraga.
Sampun kesupen saben enjing kaleh sak derengipun sare kedah nglaksanaaken cara menika.

MELAMINE.... Napa niku (what's that?)

What is MELAMINE?








In making:

Melamine is used to manufacture plastic material


Melamine floor board


How come this material is included in the baby milk powder?
It looks like milk powder!



What effect will be if consume by people or animal?



So far 13000 babies victim in China.



Mulane ana ing Indonesia kabeh produk susu lan camilan sing diimport saka China dirazia.
Muga-muga ning Indonesia ora kedaden ana sing mati merga susu.

Beware of your PC

BDV-443787-BDV

I got an email, that good to be share:

During a recent visit to an optician, one of my friends was told of an
exercise for the eyes by a specialist doctor that he termed as
20-20-20 ." It is apt for all of us, who spend long hours at our desks,
looking at the computer screen.
I Thought I'd share it with you. 20-20-20

Step I :-

After every 20 minutes of looking into the computer screen, turn your
head and try to look at any object placed at least 20 feet away. This
changes the focal length of your eyes, a must-do for the tired eyes.

Step II :-

Try and blink your eyes for 20 times in succession, to moisten them.

Step III :-

Time permitting of course, one should walk 20 paces after every 20 minutes
of sitting in one particular posture. Helps blood circulation for the entire body.

Otherwise our eye would be like this....

We just the smallest dust!

The Earth is the place where we live.










Earth just nothing... compare to Jupiter










And when we compare to the Sun.
It just a little dot.









When Sun compares to Acturus













And then to Antares, the biggest Star that we can find.
Antares is 1000 light-years from earth.
( A light year is 5,865,696,000,000 miles (9,460,800,000,000 kilometers))

Do you realize? Earth just nothing
We are nothing.
Subhanallah.....
We just the smallest dust.

A Message by George Carlin, comedian:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but
shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend
more, but have less, we buy more but enjoy less. We have bigger houses
and smaller families, more conveniances, but less time. We have more
degrees, but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgement, more
experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh to little, drive
too fast, get too angry, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV
too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life
not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but
have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered
outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not
better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've
conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn
less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not
to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce
more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small
character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days
of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality,
one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from
cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the
showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology
can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to
share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe because that
little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only
treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of
all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from
deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

Kudune rak ya diwenehi pancing ...

Mbah Karsa muring-muring, suarane ngati keprungu saka ndalan ngarep omah.

Ana apa ya? Ora biasane mbah Karsa sing biasane aluse ngungkuli wedak pilus kok saiki muring muring ra karuan. Merga penasaran aku nyedhak pengin weruh.

“Kula nuwun…..!”

“Eh mangga nak, kok njanur gunung?”

“Wonten napa ta mbah? Kok sajak hawane panas”.

Mbah Karsa biasane tanggap karo sesemonanku, mbuh ethok-ethok ra ngerti apa lan piye ora jelas.

“Lha kok suantene duka-duka ngantos tiyang lewat dha mengo sedanten”

“Ooo….lha ya kuwi ta….bab BBM ..piye lire ya amrih ora mundhak regane?”

“La niku rak urusane pemerintah ta mbah?” Aku nyoba ngleremke penggalihe.

“Coba bayangna… pemerintah ki sapa….sing ngupayakne dheweke dadi pemerintah ki sapa? Aja salah …aku uga melu andil ta?”

“Lha kok saiki penak wae arep gawe sengsarane rakyate…sing milih”

“Sampun ngoten ta mbah….” Bingung olehku arep ngendheg ngendikane.

“Sekedhap…cobi pun galih… sebabe napa kok mundhak?”

“Niku gara-gara regi BBM wonten pasar dunia menika nggih mindak lho mbah! Tambah awis…kamangka APBN menika etungane sakderenge mundhak… lha rak tekor”

“Lha mosok ngono-ngono kuwi kok ora kepetung ta?”

“Lire pripun mbah?”

“Sing jenenge undhak-undhakan rega kuwi kudu dietung ta… elek-elek aku ki ya ngerti nek rega kuwi susah dimangerteni, lha mula anakalane sing bab ngono kuwi kudu ana cadhangane supaya anak karo bojo tetep kecukupan sanajan tekor ora sengsara”

“Lha….nggih ngoten niku, karepe pemerintah, tekor sithik ning tetep saged kecukupan sedanten” “Trep pun cocok”

“Lha terus? Mungkin nek kaya panjenengan ora papa….lha nek dinggo wong sing dha kekurangan rak tambah dadi gembel!”

“Nanging mangke wonten BLT kok mbah”

“Mosok mikire ngono ya? Kudune rak ya diwenehi pancing ora kok diwenehi iwak”

“Inggih mbah”

“Aku ki gur miris karo akibate, nek ngerti-ngerti mak dhel… kabeh rega dadi mumbul dhuwur apa ora dadi sengsara kabeh”

“Lha sedanten nggih sami mekaten pamikranipun”

“Iya ta wis jamak yen rega BBM mundhak kabeh rega mundhak”

“Inggih kasunyatanipun inggih mekaten…namung menawi sedanten sami nggresula nggih dados awrat mbah”

“Iya jane aku ki banget percaya yen ora bakal padha pengin yen Negara iki kaco”

“Inggih mbah …kaco lan mboten gumantung saking rakyat ugi kok mbah mboten sisah didamel awrat to mbah.”

<* picture from : Inilah.com>

Ngomonge lagi Check

Dinten menika blog boten saged dibuka ...rada anyel ning nggih pripun malih.
Google ngedalaken laporan menawi wonten virus....wadhuh.
Kalih ndandani kula iseng mbuka email isine kiriman saking kanca, guyonan....ben mboten stress kalih refreshing bar digawe mumet kalih rumus sing paling susah sak donya (walah!).
Namung iklan biasa ...jan biasa tenan. Dasar Iseng!

Click picture to enlarge

Mboten dangu piyambake ngirim malih "Please take a look back to my previous mail, Imagine if that is advertising for condom"
Kula tiliki malih email piyambake ..... lho...lho...lho.....hahahahaha....
Kula dados kepingkel pingkel. Terus tak upload mriki.
We....jan....ra nggenah ki.

Test IQ.....ngomonge angel banget

TEST IQ (Paling cepet IQne paling dhuwur)


Download:
XLS File

Sakderengipun panjenegan kedah download rumiyin. Cara lan aturan wonten saklebetipun file.

ATURAN
1. Sing saged numpak gethek namung tiyang kalih thok.
2. Bapak mboten angsal kalih lare estri menawi mboten wonten Ibu.
3. Semanten ugi Ibu mboten angsal kempal kalih lare jaler menawi mboten wonten bapak.
4. Lare estri ingkang rambute abrit, nakale mboten jamak, mboten pikantuk kempal kaleh sederek sak keluargi sinten kemawon, nek Pak Polisi angsal....pun lulut nek kalih piyambake.
5. Sing saged nglampahaken gethek namung Pak Polisi, Bapak ugi Ibu.

Mangga dicobi, pripun carane supados sedanten saged disebrangaken dateng sebrang kali.

Nek saged ....wah panjenengan jan pinter tenan.
Nek mboten saged? Wah mosok mboten saged? Kebangeten tenan.
Wonten Jepang asal quis menika criosipun saged 15 menit rampung.
Menawi panjenengan taken kula, wah kula saged paling cepet nggih 5 menit.
Malah sak menika kula saged 10 detik.
Percaya sukur mboten percaya... siap-siap IQne ndhodhok mawon nggih.

Free Translation:
The RULES are as follows:
1, Only two people can travel at once
2, Daddy can not stay with the girls without the presence of the mother
3, Mum cant stay with the boys without the presence of the father
4, The arrested red-hair girl in stipy outfit cannot stay with any of the family members
5, Only the Police officer and the parents can drive the boat across the river

This test was developed and used in Japan for job and university IQ tests
This test is solved in around 15mins (in Japan)

..because it is closed.

Terus terang nembe bingung kula badhe nulis napa. Nanging bareng ketemu gambar menika kok dados semangat malih.
Crita iki tenan ora ethok-ethok.

Kula disukani kalian kanca lan dikengken mbedhek.
"Cobi kira-kira tulisan iki ana ngendi?
Sing jelas iki dudu ana Indonesia."
"Kok isa?"
"Sak bodho-bodhone manager ning Indonesia ora bakalan nulis tulisan mbodhoni ngene iki?
Aku berusaha mbedhek asale ngendi (tapi ora penting dicritakne). Aku mung pengin nandhai menawa wonten pikirane kancaku, ora mungkin wong Indonesia nganti ora paham basa Inggris apa maneh pangkate manager.
Apik tenan....bagus!
Sorene aku ketemu maneh karo kanca sing mbedheki, iseng-iseng aku takon,
"Miturut pikiranmu apa salah tulisan mau?"
"Ora, nanging sing jelas... yen ngerti kan ora mungkin nulise ngono?"
"OK...berarti ora salah lan dheweke wis isa narik perhatianmu"
"Merga nyleneh"
"Iya ...tapi yen nurut aku dheweke uwong sing ngerti uga kok...lan dheweke sengaja nulis ngono"
"Terus?"
"Cukup sakmono wae ... aja diteruske...."
"Ndhak nabrak?"
Akhire kabeh dha nyekakak..... terus pisah.
Pas mulih ketemu maneh ana parkiran. Dheweke celuk-celuk karo mlayu-mlayu... nunut mulih merga ora nggawa mobil.
Pas ana njero mobil deweke ... deweke mbahas maneh bab tulisan.
"Ketoke... omonganmu mau ana benere"
"Benere nggon ngendi?"
"Mungkin bener yen Manager mau mung golek perhatian!"
Aku mung isa gedhek-gedhek karo mesam-mesem. Kancaku macakke maneh diwaca seru banget. Pas rampung dheweke ngakak.....aku uga ngakak.

Pendhapa Agung apa maknane?

Pendhapa

Saka Wikipédia, Ènsiklopédhi Bébas ing basa Jawa / Saking Wikipédia, Bauwarna Mardika mawi basa Jawi

Langsung menyang: pandhu arah, golèk

Pendhapa iku bagian bangunan umah adat Jawa sing anane neng sisih paling ngarep. Bangunanlawang (pintu). iki biasane diarani pendhapa agung utawa pendhapa gedhe lan nduwe ukuran sing jembar banget, tanpa sekat, tanpa tembok utawa dinding uga tanpa

Pendhapa umume dibangun nganggo gaya arsitektur joglo trajumas.

Fungsi

Pendhapa nduwe fungsi kanggo nerima tamu-tamu agung, pertemuan-pertemuan resmi, kanggo pagelaran kesenian uga upacara adat.

Makna filosofi

Bangunan pendhapa iku ngandung makna sifat pradah, sifat iki antarane lapang dada, ramah tamah lan pemurah, uga mesthi isa lan siap nerima tamu. Makna liyane saka bangunan iki yaiku momot utawa sanggup nampung apa wae uga termasuk sanggup nampung lan ngatasi kabeh masalah sing timbul.

Pendhapa modern

Bangunan pendhapa neng jaman saiki isa ditemo'ake neng komplek-komplek kraton, kantor utama pemerentah (neng Jawa Tengah, Yogyakarta lan Jawa Wetan) misale kantor Bupati utawa DPRD.

Piye ta Le?

Maneh teh gelo kabeh.. ", ngono ujare Kang Karta tukang mie kocok.
Aku penasaran tak tinggal olehku nyruput kuah mie, nyedhak pengin weruh ana apa.
"Kunanon Kang, nyarekan budak saha?" Aku takon melu-melu cara Sunda, merga krungu Kang Karta nesu-nesu. Tak delok ora ana bocah ana cedhake deweke, kok isa-isane nesu.
"Eta ..tingali dina tipi, barudak sakola nepi upacara pada garelut" (Kae ...deloken ning tivi, cah sekolah bar upacara dha tawuran.
Bener, bocah-bocah sekolah padha tawuran bubaran upacara Hardiknas (Hari Pendidikan Nasional). Ck...ck...ck....jan ora idhep isin tenan, kebangeten.
Aku mung isa gedheg-gedheg, kok isa-isane. Lha sekolahe diwulang apa?
Piye ta Le.....marakke trenyuh tenan kok kowe ki.

Liputan6.com, Ambon: Peringatan Hari Pendidikan Nasional di Ambon, Maluku, dinodai tawuran pelajar. Ratusan siswa dari sejumlah sekolah terlibat perkelahian seusai upacara Hardiknas, Jumat (2/5). Aksi saling kejar terjadi ketika polisi berupaya membubarkan tawuran. Para pelajar berlarian menyelamatkan diri.

Untuk mencegah tawuran berlanjut, polisi meminta para pelajar segera kembali ke sekolah masing-masing. Sejauh ini belum diketahui penyebab perkelahian yang menodai peringatan Hardiknas ini. Diduga keributan dipicu soal fanatisme terhadap sekolah dan dendam lama akibat persoalan sepele.(YNI/Tim Liputan 6 SCTV)

Sekolah? Jan... larange pol!

Kang Kasmo tukang jamu, pringas-pringis kaya wong gendheng. Deweke gedheg-gedheg terus ngguyu ngakak. “Edan!” ngono pisuhane. Deweke nyekel Koran weton minggu wingi nemu ana Koran sing dheweke kumpulke saka tangga-tanggane. Dodol jamu ngiras dadi pemulung Koran bekas.
“Eh…eh…gendheng tenan!”
“Wis tiba dadi kere sak lawase…….Edan!”
Penasaran tak cedhaki, kebeneran aku ya butuh jamune, awakku rada pegel-pegel, mesthi seger yen ngombe jamu pegel-linu.
“Jamune Kang….pegel linu ya”, “Rada pegel boyokku, bar badminton wingi”
Penasaran aku takon ning dheweke ana apa sejatine deweke ngguya-ngguyu kaya wong kesambet.
“Kuwi lho Mas….Aku ra ngerti meneh kudu nangis apa ngguyu ngakak nek maca ning Negara manca sekolah gratis tis tis. Uedan tenan.!”
“Kosok walike negarane dhewe, nyekolahke anak kudu ketekuk ringkel isih nganggo utang tangga kiwa tengen”
“Mangka Mas,….anaku rak isih TK”
“Jan ora kebayang tenan, apa ya isa tekan kuliah”
Aku lagi ngerti yen Kang Kasmo maca ana Koran, ngenani bab perbandingan sekolah ning Indonesia karo ning luar negri.

“Mas….njenengan kok malah nglamun”, “ …napa njenengan nggih melu bingung?”
“Kula bingung tenin, lha ning kene… ning Negara sing butuh wong pinter sing akeh ben cepet maju, kok sekolah larange jan kebangeten. Embuh napa sebabe ning sing jelas kaya-kaya yen kudu nyekolahke anak tekan universitas berarti ngimpi kula nggih”
Universitas larange pol, SMA tekan SD uga larang. Sing marahi gemes ki lha wong…TK sing sinaune mung dolanan karo nyanyi we ya larang. Emh….emh…jan gur isa gedheg-gedheg.”

Susah olehku arep medhot grenengane Kang Kasmo.
“Wis to Kang rasah dipikir….dilakoni wae… muga-muga sesuk sapa ngerti wolak-walike jaman. Ning kene uga melu kabeh sekolah gratis…tis…tis.”

Bar ngombe jamu aku pamit karo mikir lan ndonga….muga-muga sing duwe wewenang nggawe aturan duwe pamikiran pada karo sing dipikir Kang Kasmo.

Negara iki isih butuh wong pinter sing akeh amrih negarane ndang maju.

Kebo nusu gudel

"Kebo nusu gudel". Apa maknane?
Yen sing njawab dagelan mesthi ngomong jawabe "keri".
Wis suwe aku ora krungu paribasan mau. Nanging ya wis ora genep lumrah yen jenenge kebo kok nyusu ning gudel (anak kebo). Maknane nek ora kleru, wong tuwa ngansu kawruh marang bocah.

Lha nek jaman sak iki ora mung ngangsu kawruh nanging, ya kasunyatane wong tuwo padha rayahan olehe pengin anake supaya padha isa dadi artis ben isa melu nunut sugih. Nanging ya dudu salahe yen sak iki bocah cilik-cilik padha dikongkon karo wong tuwane ben padha isa nyanyi isa megal-megol sapa ngerti isa mlebu tivi utawa malah dadi artis .

Yen tak gatekke lha ya pancen bener yen dadi artis kuwi mesthi sugihe. Kaya kaya duwit gari nawu. Durung nate aku weruh artis ora duwe omah emplek-emplekan tumpakane pit onthel.

Yen tak pikir-pikir ana apa ya sak iki kuwi?

Kaya-kaya yen dadi artis kuwi mesti jos tenan. Mesthi....Uenake pol. Golek duwit gampang dadi apa wae bisa. Sithik-sithik mlebu tivi, mboh ala mbuh apik.
Sak iki kebo padha angon gudele ben isa kebone nusu....hahahaha. Nunut sukses!

Pagupon Omahe Dara

Mbah Karsa biasane saben isuk metheti manuk dara karo putere uga ingon-ingon liyane, makani manuke. Nanging sak iki wis ora ana meneh.
Biasane bocah cilik padha olok-olokan "Arep metheti manuke mbah Karsa". Ngono guyonane. Sak iki wis ara ana meneh.Yen tak eling eling jaman aku isih cilik, akeh omah manuk dara ana sakiwa tengen omah. Omah manuk dara digawe saka papan albasia dibentuk kaya omah sing dideleh dhuwur nganggo pring.
Pagupon omahe dara ngono arane.

Jaman sak iki kaya kok wis ora ana maneh, babarblas, malah dara-dara sak iki padha diuber-uber ben ora padha mabur-mabur sesliweran. Kabeh padha wedi karo sing jenenge flu burung. O alah... mesakne tenan nasibe si dara.

Sapa ta ya sing ora wedi, wong sing jenenge flu burung, nek wis kena wis mesthi apes nunggu dina kapan ngadhep sing Kuasa. Ora mung dara, sing jenenge pitik jawa, bebek, menthok lan sapanunggalane kaya-kaya wis blas ora ana maneh sing wani ngingu.
Mbah Karsa sing sugihe merga saka ingon-ingon sakiki wis blas ora nduwe ya mung gari wedhus sidji thil merga ning ndesane ana sing kena flu burung, dadi kudu di tumpes kelor supaya ora marai nyebare penyakit mau. Ngono ngomonge petugas Dinas Peternakan, sing mara nganggo putih-putih kaya astronot arep mudhun ning mbulan.
Mbah Karsa mung isa pasrah, pagupon sak darane di obong ana tengah lapangan, uga menthok lan kalkune sing biasane nyekukluk saben ana tamu rawuh wis ora keprungu meneh merga wis dadi areng.

Piye meneh ta lhe. Tinimbang aku utawa tanggane sing mati wis ben wae diobong ben penyakite ilang, resik. Ngono ngendikane mbah Karsa.

Nggih Mbah....muga-muga nasibe si manuk dara mboten dados kewan langka.

Mangga pinarak

Ngaturaken sugeng rawuh dumateng panjenengan sedaya ingkang sampun kersa ningali blog punika.

Mugi jalaran kanthi blog punika saged dados pepiling dumateng agenging lan endahing budaya jawi.

Katuran dumateng panjenengan sedaya, menawi gadhah pemanggih, mugi kersa urun rembag tumrap budaya lan mboten kesupen kula suwun sageda caos kawruh kangge kasaenan lan trepipun kangge blog punika